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productivity, light-hearted humor
Aug. 12th, 2006 03:07 amProof that I haven't just been jerking off, hula-hooping in Malibu, wandering through the redwoods, and hanging out with RAW this summer...
Baryogenesis, Dark Matter and the Pentagon
Some people make houses, or software, or weapons of mass destruction... I make papers, that's my job now, I guess. Kind of nice to get one done. This makes numero dos. No more condensed matter for me, it's high energy all the way!
I emailed my sister a link to this, and of course she responded to me with two words: "In English?" Since I'm sure she's not the only one thinking that, here is the reply I sent her:
( English translation )
Back to the more technical jargon, for the few who can read it... one of the more embarassing things was that halfway through we realized the leading order irrelevant operators generating the effective potential for the pseudo-Goldstone boson should have been dimension 7 instead of 6, due to the R-symmetry in the Pentagon model. This changed a lot of the numbers, and a few of the conclusions, but fortunately we didn't have to redo any of the hard work. It's still possible to save the Pentagon, and fit the dark matter, and generate the right baryon asymmetry, all in a day's work, but only with a heirarchy problem or similar ugly things that may or may not work. But who knows, maybe someone will find another use for this particular mechanism, it still turned out a decent paper and I did learn a lot.
On a more comical note, I happend to run across an abstract today for a paper that contained the phrase "boosted fivebrane gas". For some reason, this strikes me as one of the most ridiculous sounding phrases I've seen yet in string theory (and believe me, that's saying a lot!) At some point, during my laughing through my nose, the following imaginery conversation took place in my head:
Interviewer: So, I see your current work is on "boosted fivebrane gasses". Could you tell me a bit about them?
New hire: Um, right. Well, uh... boosted fivebrane gasses. They're like, uh... gasses that are made out of 5-dimensional membranes, but boosted, ya know?
Interviewer: Hmmm. Could you elaborate?
New hire: Hell if I know. I just work on them, to tell you the truth I doubt anyone really knows what the mother fuckers are, but I'm quite certain they're useful for something.
Interviewer: Son, are you sure you haven't been inhaling some of the boosted fivebrane gas?
New hire: Me, smoking the BFG? No sir, my lungs are clear of that evil shit.
Interviewer: Good to know. Because I see a lot of reckless youngsters these days switching from Nitrous Oxide to Boosted Fivebrane Gas. It's far more potent, and stays in the system longer, but will fuck your mind like a dog in heat.
Baryogenesis, Dark Matter and the Pentagon
Some people make houses, or software, or weapons of mass destruction... I make papers, that's my job now, I guess. Kind of nice to get one done. This makes numero dos. No more condensed matter for me, it's high energy all the way!
I emailed my sister a link to this, and of course she responded to me with two words: "In English?" Since I'm sure she's not the only one thinking that, here is the reply I sent her:
( English translation )
Back to the more technical jargon, for the few who can read it... one of the more embarassing things was that halfway through we realized the leading order irrelevant operators generating the effective potential for the pseudo-Goldstone boson should have been dimension 7 instead of 6, due to the R-symmetry in the Pentagon model. This changed a lot of the numbers, and a few of the conclusions, but fortunately we didn't have to redo any of the hard work. It's still possible to save the Pentagon, and fit the dark matter, and generate the right baryon asymmetry, all in a day's work, but only with a heirarchy problem or similar ugly things that may or may not work. But who knows, maybe someone will find another use for this particular mechanism, it still turned out a decent paper and I did learn a lot.
On a more comical note, I happend to run across an abstract today for a paper that contained the phrase "boosted fivebrane gas". For some reason, this strikes me as one of the most ridiculous sounding phrases I've seen yet in string theory (and believe me, that's saying a lot!) At some point, during my laughing through my nose, the following imaginery conversation took place in my head:
Interviewer: So, I see your current work is on "boosted fivebrane gasses". Could you tell me a bit about them?
New hire: Um, right. Well, uh... boosted fivebrane gasses. They're like, uh... gasses that are made out of 5-dimensional membranes, but boosted, ya know?
Interviewer: Hmmm. Could you elaborate?
New hire: Hell if I know. I just work on them, to tell you the truth I doubt anyone really knows what the mother fuckers are, but I'm quite certain they're useful for something.
Interviewer: Son, are you sure you haven't been inhaling some of the boosted fivebrane gas?
New hire: Me, smoking the BFG? No sir, my lungs are clear of that evil shit.
Interviewer: Good to know. Because I see a lot of reckless youngsters these days switching from Nitrous Oxide to Boosted Fivebrane Gas. It's far more potent, and stays in the system longer, but will fuck your mind like a dog in heat.
